Friday, December 13, 2013

NEWS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SO I have great news - I got some testing done to see why I keep miscarrying and the results came back as a blood clotting disorder. It is something treatable and there are lots of women who have healthy babies once diagnosed and treated during pregnancy (simply with a daily baby aspirin or herperin shots - great right!!!!). Chase and I can have more children! Best way to end the year - Thank you God for this answer! I still have lots of questions before I plunge back into trying for another child, but I am glad that God is allowing these answers to come our way. I am grateful I live in a place where I have access to these tests and can have proper medicines. Beyond grateful! All that being said, I have to share this: I was really sad when I first found out, the idea this is treatable and I could have held my babies if I had just known, or even that just one of them could have lived, I was sad. God and I had a long talk, and He reminded me today that a pill is not the reason I should have such peace about having another child, in fact a pill does not at all remove His sovereignty from my life. I cant have more children because I can take a pill, but because God will heal my body of this disorder, whether by treatment or miracle (I mean, I do have one amazing, miracle daughter). He is Creator, Sustainer, Giver of all good things, the children I lost they were good things, He created their lives and did sustain them for a time. A pill wasn't going to change His plans for my life and theirs. I have said to Him "Lord, You know You could have told me (when I was pregnant) to take a baby asprin, and I would have obeyed. You know I would have. I would have blindly obeyed You." In my heart I know this is true, but He didn't tell me; and I am never without Him. He didn't miss some memo to intervene on my babies behalf. I dont fully know why He choose this or allowed this but I know He IS with me each moment, He sees me, He is intentional, and He is purposeful beyond what I can comprehend or understand. Those are hard truths to digest in my soul. These truth weigh heavy on my heart - but they are fully His truths. God gave me two children I wont ever know - and He will allow me more because of the timing of His answers and His healing in my life. I know it's a lot to just throw out there, but it's His truth in my life, and Yours. He is never far from us.........



Now Momma can get to "cookin" too. Is that inappropriate to write here.....

And just in time, one out of diapers (almost).

Practicing holding a baby perhaps.... Lets hope not, poor Mickey is getting plenty of love, but maybe not oxygen... (good thing he doesn't need it, right)

Let the fun begin!!!! 

2 comments:

  1. Interested in what your disorder is called... is it MTHFR? That is why I lost a baby and after finding out, I was able to take measures to have 2 healthy babies. In addition to aspirin I also have to take prescription folic acid. I am so happy you found out how to prevent another miscarriage! Also, how amazing is it that you were able to carry your sweet girl against the odds of what your body was trying to do to that pregnancy at the time? ! She truly is a miracle!!!!

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    1. Mandy, sorry I hadent responded on facebook or here. I just saw this. I am not sure what the actual name is, I havent seen the DR they just called with the results the day before I wrote this and I have an appt to get all the information. I am assuming it is MTHFR from what I have read! Thanks for this awesome reply. Emily had told me your story after I lost the 2nd baby, I thought of you after I found out, even before I saw your comments. I feel a sense of physical relief, but I also felt this overwhelming joy, despite my moment of sadness, because YES I had this disorder and yet, I had E. It really changes my perspective on the whole situation - God must have amazing, way beyond plans for E and yet, I see His purpose in every life in our family. I will always be sad, but I have so much more to celebrate and be joyful for!!!!!

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